


Party Games for Villains

by storiesfortravellers



Category: Arrow (TV 2012), DC's Legends of Tomorrow (TV), The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: Crack, Gen, Humor, M/M, Party Games, Truth or Dare, Villains
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-12
Updated: 2017-02-12
Packaged: 2018-09-23 18:29:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 950
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9670823
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/storiesfortravellers/pseuds/storiesfortravellers
Summary: Eobard makes the villains and rogues (and morally gray characters) have a party. They decide on Truth or Dare as a party game. (Snart and Rory and Hartley are still villains in this AU, and Eobard has never worked with Malcolm). Also, Eobard is ridiculous.Contains violence, threats of violence. Implied one-sided Barry/Len, past Slade/Oliver.





	

“This party sucks,” Leonard griped.

“Let’s rob someone,” Mick said.

“Rob anyone here and that’s the last thing you’ll do,” Malcolm said, crossing his arms.

Mick grinned, clearly liking the idea of a challenge, but Leonard held him back by the arm.

Amanda Waller walked over. “I agree with SnoCone. This party is boring.”

Len cocked an eyebrow. “Normally, I’d kill someone for calling me ‘SnoCone.’”

Waller rolled her eyes. “You’d try.”

“I like you,” Len said with a grin. 

“Entirely not mutual,” she said, then turned and walked away.

Slade threw a bottle on the ground. “That’s it, I’m out of here. This party is the worst.”

“Wait!” Eobard said. “Nobody leaves my party until I say so. Play a party game or something.”

“Seriously?” Mark Mardon griped.

“This party is almost bad enough to make me become a good guy. Almost,” Hartley said.

Eobard started vibrating, holding a hand up and threatening to phase into the chest of anyone who argued.

“Fine,” Mick grumbled. “But go get more jalapeno dip.”

Eobard grumbled, “Fine. But be playing a game in the next minute!”

“Is he really going to kill us if we don’t play a party game?” Waller asked.

“One can only hope,” Len said.

“I’ve got one,” Malcolm said. “Truth or dare.”

“That’s stupid,” Mick said, “And believe me, I know stupid.”

“Actually, I like that idea,” Waller said.

Hartley snorted. “Sure you do. You’d love to get our secrets so you can give our hideouts to the good guys.”

“So?” Waller said.

“If you’re such a goody two shoes, why’re you here with us?” Mark asked her. 

“I’m not a villain,” Waller said, then smiled, “But I’ll accomplish my goals by any means necessary.”

“Sounds kind of like a villain to me,” Mick said. 

“Don’t worry,” Len added, “Mick means that as a compliment.”

“I’m sure,” she answered.

“So then we’ll play?” Malcolm asked.

“Fine,” Slade said. “You go first, businessman.”

Malcolm smiled. “Happy to. Leonard Snart. Truth or Dare.”

Len tilted his head. “Truth. And I know what you’re going to ask. The answer is, yes, your haircut makes you look like you’re in an aging boy band.”

“Ha,” Malcolm said. “My question for Leonard is, if you could do anything you wanted to the Flash, what would you do to him?” 

Mick snorted. “Make out with him,” he muttered, taking another swig of bourbon. 

The rest of them giggled. 

“I’d tell him to kill Malcolm Merlyn,” Len said pointedly, then pointed at Slade Wilson. “You. Truth or Dare.”

“Dare, obviously,” Slade said. 

Len smiled. “Try to kill Eobard when he gets back.”

“Like I wasn’t planning to anyway,” Slade said, leaning back with his hands behind his head.

“Good, then.”

Slade looked at Waller. “Truth or Dare.”

“Dare.”

“Shoot the Weather Wizard, I’m sick of him,” Slade said.

“Gladly,” Waller said, then pulled out her gun, but Mark whooshed away. 

“You missed,” Slade said.

“No, I didn’t. You can’t prove that I did. And I can have doctored video showing I got him in less than 45 seconds, so don’t test me,” Waller said. She pointed at Malcolm. “Truth or Dare?”

“Truth.”

“If you had to take down the Green Arrow, how would you do it?”

“Exploit his loved ones. Except his sister,” Malcolm added. “That would lead to lots and lots of pain for you.” Malcolm glanced at Hartley then and asked, “Truth or Dare.”

“Truth.”

“If you could sleep with anyone here, who would you pick?” Malcolm asked.

“Eobard,” Hartley said.

“No, not any villain. One of us here now,” Malcolm specified.

Hartley sighed. “This vulgarian, I suppose,” he said, pointing at Slade.

“If that’s supposed to offend me, try harder,” Slade said.

Hartley looked at Mick. “Truth or Dare?” 

“Dare. And please, let it be a dare to light something on fire.”

“Kiss Malcolm on the mouth right now.”

“Gross,” Mick said. “I don’t put my tongue in preppies who ride in yachts.”

“I had no idea you were so political,” Waller said.

Len smirked. “He’s not. He just thinks preppy billionaire types are bad in bed.”

“So he’s never slept with Oliver Queen then?” Slade Wilson asked.

“Why would anyone here even know some random rich boy like Oliver Queen?” Hartley said. 

Waller, Slade, Mick, Len, and Malcolm did their best to look casual.

At that moment, Eobard came back. “Chips and dip, from three separate regional cuisines from three separate regions. You’re welcome. Now, what game are we playing?”

“Truth or Dare,” Slade said.

“Dare,” Eobard said, smiling.

“I dare you to die,” Slade said and tried to stab him with a sword, which Eobard easily dodged.

“Wait, does this mean I lose if I don’t do the dare?” Eobard said.

Waller quickly answered, “Yes, and that means I win, and my prize is that you have to give me all nuclear codes from all countries, do it now before anyone thinks you’re a sore loser.”

Eobard returned with the codes in an instant.

Len shot the papers with his freeze gun. “Even I know that’s a bad idea. And usually I like bad ideas.”

“I can vouch for that,” Mick said.

“You guys are a hoot,” Eobard said. “I’m glad we got together.”

“I’m just going to find another way to kill you,” Slade grumbled.

Eobard grinned. “Wow. When I end the universe, I’ll really miss this banter.”

The party was immediately silent.

“When you what now?” Waller demanded.

“Nothing. Never mind. Party onward,” Eobard said, then turned to start filling drinks.

Len narrowed his eyes and glanced at Hartley, Waller, and Slade. A brief nod, and they all understood; they’d all meet later, and not for a game.


End file.
